Saturday, June 09, 2007

Paris Hilton back in jail



Ooh-wah, ooh-wah, ooh-wah. Don't cry Paris. Don't cry. Everything will be okay......I think. I feel sorry for Paris Hilton. She's not going to see a penis in 40 days. That's too long for her. Penis is her life support, along with make-up, partying, and a cell phone. She's going to be locked in a prison with a bunch of females who look like Mr. T. Those female prisoners are going to treat her like a fat kid treats his pizza. They're going to touch her and make out with her. I don't think Paris has ever made out with females who look like grown men. Maybe Paris will put on some weight while she's locked up. Maybe she'll lift weights and give piggyback rides to a 300lb female prisoner named Tyrone. Imagine if Paris comes out of prison looking like a WNBA player. That would be something. She would beat up the paparazzi and shoot a jump shot over them. What if Paris comes out of prison as a gangster. No one would be able to make jokes about her. She would shoot you with her mini handgun that Tyrone gave her in prison. But I hope Paris doesn't come out of prison looking like a WNBA player or a gangster. I like her just the way she is, cute and anorexic. I hope Paris stays out of trouble in prison and doesn't get stabbed in her bones.