Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Fuck you Santa!

I believed in Santa Claus until I was 18 years old. Every year I thought he would come to my house and bring me presents, but that holly jolly fat bastard never did. So, fuck him. Fuck Santa Claus! Every Christmas I hoped Santa Claus would stop by my house and leave presents under our small Christmas tree. I left milk and cookies for him by my window. I even waited for Santa to visit until New Years Eve. I thought maybe it’s taking him awhile to get to my house because he has so many houses to visit. I was delusional. He was never going to come to my house because you know why – he’s an ass hole. Santa, if you’re reading this, Fuck you!! You and your stupid red costume and those moose that you call reindeers. You’re selfish. You treat those leprechauns in your factory like slaves. All they do is work all day building toys, while you sit on the couch watching Dr. Phil. You should be ashamed of yourself. You and your stupid fake laugh. Ho, Ho, Ho my ass. I hope you get stuck in a chimney. Fuck you and Mrs. Claus too!!

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